I’m Believing God

Well, I just finished working through the Bible study “Believing God” written by Beth Moore. I began this study earlier this year as I was praying about how to know and understand God’s promises.  I am so thankful that I had the chance to work through the workbook and watch a few of the videos online. I didn’t do the study with a group, I just worked through it on my own. It was an eye-opening, life changing experience.

I am going to now take some time to review my notes and go back through the lessons, not to do the study again, but to attempt to summarize what I have learned. My hope is to record some of those things in blog posts. But I also face the reality that, in just a few short weeks, we will welcome baby #2 into our family! So if I am writing, its going to have to happen fast!

There are a few of you who have shared with me that you are following along on my journey to knowing and believing God’s promises. I am so thankful for you. I have wanted to share more of what I have been discovering in this process, but every time I come to write I have felt like my time had not yet come. Now that I have completed the study I am wondering if I will now be released to share the testimony of how God has revealed more of himself to me over the past several months. I am hoping that I will. I have learned so much and am so very thankful for the life-giving lessons the Lord has taught me during my study time and I can’t wait to see how he brings it all together in a way that makes sense for me to share it all.

I’ve said several times this year that my family and I are living in the midst of great uncertainty; however, I have now come to understand and accept that we ALL live in the midst of great uncertainty. Proverbs 27:1 says, “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring forth.” James 4:13-16 says, “Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”  As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil.

We are foolish to believe that life is certain and secure, because it is not. No one knows the future, what may or may not happen tomorrow, next year, or even later today. Yet we (I) put our trust in a man-made form of certainty rather than in the God who gives and takes away.

Its so easy to slip into the comfortable allusion of life’s predictability and I believe it makes us complacent. At least, I know it makes me complacent. I am not saying we should live our lives with anxiety over the future. I am saying that, there is no certainty in life apart from God. When faced with more obvious uncertainties in my life, God has shown me a new way to live, day-by-day, trusting in Him to lead, provide, and sustain me until the sun rises on another day. He has convinced me that, as long as I keep my eyes fixed on him, nothing will stand in the way of my being exactly who he wants me, where he wants me, how he wants me, in all seasons of life.

Have I discovered promises in the Bible that I can rightly apply to my life? Absolutely. But what’s more is that God is teaching me that living life is so much more than line item promises and prayers, when we reorder our priorities and seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, he truly will give us everything we need for a a full and fulfilling life. The key is fully surrendering our lives to his way of doing things. And his way of doing things starts with studying his word.

Some may disagree with that statement, but I have come to realize that the most important thing for me to know, after knowing Jesus as my savior, is knowing his word— like the back of my hand! Like the song lyrics to my favorite Patty Griffin song! Like the instructions to my favorite recipes! Yes, I am much more familiar, and have much better recall of the lines in a handful of John Hughes movies than I do the living and active word of God. I have resolved that this must change.

Over the past months, I have spent a lot less time praying and a lot more time reading, studying, meditating on and seeking out what God has already said to us in his word. So often I have prayed, “God, just tell me what to do, where to go, what is going to happen, why did this happen, when will this happen, what is your will for my life?” and been reluctant to open my Bible and let his supernatural words answers my questions. The number one take away so far this year is a recommitment to knowing God’s word and allowing his word to transform me from the inside out.

My pastor preached last Sunday and said “God doesn’t “zap” us, he transforms us.” God is much more interested in the process of our sanctification, of our becoming more like Christ, than he is instantaneously answering our questions and solving our problems. As we allow ourselves to be transformed by his word, our questions are answered and our problems are solved… or they go away… because our perspective changes. The temptation we fight against is viewing God like Santa Clause instead of the all-powerful, all-knowing, almighty God of the universe. Of course, many don’t view God this way, so these words are written more for those who believe God is who the Bible says he is.

This post has grown long and somewhat stream of consciousness. But I hope in some way this gives an update about my journey to those who are interested. I also hope to share more specific things that I have learned in the days to come, especially now that I have completed the Believing God study, and have time to review and write out these things in a more concise way.

I leave you with these passages of scripture that have served as a backdrop for all that I have experienced so far this year. I pray you find encouragement for your own journey in the power of the living and active word of God.

⁶ And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him. Hebrews 11:6

¹² For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, ¹⁷ so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. 2 Timothy 3:16-17

²⁵ “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life^[e]?

²⁸ “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matthew 6:25-34

 

How to Face Your Fears

God is leading me down a very interesting and unexpected path as I seek to know and believe his promises.  The more I study the promises of God and ask for his help believing his promises, I find him leading me face to face with my fears.

To be truthful, fear is what propelled me into this study of believing God. I am not sure I realized it at first but four months in now, I see that there are deep rooted fears from which I seek relief, and I am humbly seeking relief in God’s word.

God, as always, is faithful. He is showing me scriptures that seem to be true prescriptions for abolishing my fears. However, I can’t come to a scripture without facing the fear that led me to it. And then I doubt. I get caught up in an abyss of “what ifs” and “what abouts” and “how can I know for certains” and I find my eyes turning away from the Word made Flesh and onto the waves around me that want to drown me in an ocean of anxiety and fear.

Praise God, he strengths me and I continue to press on. I am facing my fears in this ultimate quest to really believe God. And the more I saturate myself with scripture, the more my mind is renewed. Now I am beginning to frame my fears in light of the gospel and what it really means to be a child of God, and a disciple of Jesus Christ. Bringing God into my fears and believing him to conquer the darkness there has been one of the most frightening yet freeing exercises of my walk with God.

I also realize that I have only just begun to face my fears. But I also realize that the ONLY way I am going to learn to believe God’s promises and rightly apply them to my life is to shine the brightest light on my fears and face them, once and for all.

Believing God = Facing Your Fears in the context of God’s promises.

A few verses that encourage me:

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” (Joshua 1:9)

The Lord is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life— of whom shall I be afraid? (Psalm 27:1)

“I sought the LORD, and he answered me, he delivered me from all my fears. . . . The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them. . . . Fear the LORD, you his saints, for those who fear him lack nothing” (Ps. 34:4, 7, 9)

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you… In God, whose word I praise— in God I trust and am not afraid. What can mere mortals do to me? in God I trust and am not afraid. What can man do to me? (Psalm 56:3-4,11)

For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. (Romans 8:15)

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7)

“The LORD…will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” (Deut. 31:8)

“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10)

“I sought the LORD, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears” (Psalm 34:4)

“I will…not be afraid. The LORD, the LORD himself is my strength and my defense…” (Isaiah 12:2)

My son, do not let wisdom and understanding out of your sight, preserve sound judgment and discretion; they will be life for you, an ornament to grace your neck.Then you will go on your way in safety, and your foot will not stumble.When you lie down, you will not be afraid; when you lie down, your sleep will be sweet.Have no fear of sudden disaster or of the ruin that overtakes the wicked,for the Lord will be at your side and will keep your foot from being snared. (Proverbs 3:21-26)

The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm. (Matthew 8:25-26)

The Power the Fuels My Belief

As I continue to pursue the promises of God in Scripture, I have come to realize and believe that the power fueling all spiritual belief is the Word of God. The Scriptures themselves are the spoken, inspired Words of God. There is truly nothing more powerful for those who believe than ingesting, inhaling, absorbing, immersing ourselves in the perfect, true promises of God’s word.

What I have learned now, only a few months into a year long commitment to believing God’s promises, is that every single word in the Bible IS a promise. The whole thing is a promise. Not one word is false. Every sentence is a bonafied guarantee. I thought I would seek and find a list of promises; but instead, God is showing me how his entire Word is a promise. Its delightfully overwhelming, and I have had a very difficult time putting this to words for my blog, which is why I have not posted much.

I am one of those people who can say “I’ve been a Christian all my life,” growing up in a family that taught me about Jesus from day one; but I can say to you today that I have never, in all my 36 years, felt as strongly about the power in the Word of God than I do at this very moment.

I started 2013 with this purpose in mind: to dig as deeply into the Bible as I could, to find the promises God has for me that I can apply to my life today, and learn to apply these promises in a God-honoring way. The most important thing I can share about this journey thus far is that it did not take long, AT ALL, for the Word of God to do exactly what it says it will do if we spend time reading and earnestly seeking God in it: I am renewed. I have clarity. I have joy. I have peace. And the best most exciting part of this is that we have only just begun.

In no way am I saying that I’ve got it all figured out. I am just so amazed and overjoyed at the outcome of this short time of diligently seeking God’s promises that I want others to know that any of us can have this experience if we believe God.

May this post move you in some way to dig into the Word of God on your own. If you have any questions or need help finding a place to start, I am happy to share more about my personal process, but there are many ways to study God’s word and you need to find what works best for you. I have really benefited from the Blue Letter Bible app for Iphone/Ipad. This tool is full of resources, you can see the original Hebrew or Greek words by just tapping a verse, and see the full definition of those words. You can also view side-by-side translation comparisons of specific verses and access many different commentaries on passages of Scripture. Its a FREE, fast and easy way to research the Bible. Check it out!

Hebrews 11:6
And without faith it is impossible to please God, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.

Proverbs 30:5
Every Word of God proves true; he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.

Psalm 119:105
Your Word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

Isaiah 40:8
The grass withers, the flower fades, but the Word of our God will stand forever.

Isaiah 55:10-11
“For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my Word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.

2 Timothy 2:9
…the Word of God is not bound!

2 Timothy 3:16-17
All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work.

Hebrews 4:12
For the Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart.

Believing God Day by Day

My study of God’s promises and quest to really believe these promises is going extremely well. I am overjoyed to say that I am in a season where God is showing me things and revealing things and helping me understand things in ways I have never experienced — in ways that are truly more than I could ask or imagine.

The last time I found myself in a similar season was 2003. This is the year that many things in my life changed. A close relationship came to an end. Through heartbreak and tears I rediscovered my relationship with Jesus in a fresh way, giving my life and lifeSTYLE over to him during a sermon series leading up to Easter. On the night of our missions pastor’s commissioning, I attended my first mission trip interest meeting and found myself serving the poor in Guatemala alongside Compassion International not once but twice that year. God grew my faith in mind-blowing ways. It was a season of life where scripture seemed to dance off the pages of my Bible as I read and understood more about God’s great love for me, for his global Church, for the nations of the earth.

This is also the year that I completed the Breaking Free study by Beth Moore. This study taught me to dive into the word and rightly apply scripture to my prayer life, equipping me with the power of the Holy Spirit to literally break free from lies I had believed. Not every stronghold was broken that year, but it was the year that began my journey and the fruit of healing in my life in the 10 following years has been a miraculous work of the Lord.

Interestingly enough, 2003 is also the year that ended with my meeting my husband on New Year’s Day 2004. Certainly 2003 was a year of divine preparation in more ways than I could possibly have understood at that time.

Now, 10 years later in 2013, I find myself in a similar situation. I am taking breaking free to the next level, using the Beth Moore Bible study Believing God as the teaching tool to help me know and believe God’s promises. And I can say already that it feels like it did in 2003. I sense God’s presence in even more abundant ways. I can also say that I am making different choices, not only with respect to what I choose to believe, but also in terms of 1. how I spend my time and 2. how I manage my actions.

This is a season of waiting on God in so many profound ways. There are all kinds of examples I could share here about how God is showing me more of who he is and I find myself literally feasting on his Word like never before. And its not rote dull-drudgery, it is famished,  “I can’t wait for the food to hit the table” devouring of the things I am learning. I am in awe of how quickly he is uncovering areas where I am still bound believing straight up LIES about Him and myself and the life he has given me; and I am relieved at how he is renewing my mind, day by day, in light of these discoveries.

I worry about this post coming off the wrong way. I dont want to seem in such a way as I am not. I know full well that it is only God’s grace that allows me to enter this “Holy of Holies” and that according to His will and His perfect timing do I move forward in my understanding of his truth. I would gladly stay in my prayer closet and privately exclaim the greatness of God’s revelation but I don’t think that is what he wants. In his timing, I believe he wants to me to unpack all the wonderful things I am learning here on my little blog. But for now, I am still taking it all in, savoring this intimate time with my loving heavenly father. And I know that when the time is right he will give me the words to share more about this incredible journey.

Until that time, I just want to give praise to God, who loves me and provides for my needs in exceedingly abundant ways, according to his riches and glory in Christ Jesus. Thank you Lord!

And if you are looking for a teaching tool to help you understand God I strongly encourage Believing God and Breaking Free by Beth Moore. I use the Workbook. You can also read the book but the workbook is where its at. You can also buy lectures online at lifeway.com.

BELIEVE!

I said in my last post that my “theme” for the year would be God’s Promises, that I would take this year to study and learn all I can about God’s promises that I can stand on today. As I began my study I recognized a word emerging from this: BELIEVE.

For me, God is saying: “It’s not enough for you to know and understand my promises, I want you to BELIEVE them, and BELIEVE they are for you!”

So my theme will not change, but I have decided my one word for 2013 is BELIEVE.

It’s funny, when I first started thinking about what my “one word” would be I thought of persevere. There are going to be alot of things that I will need to persevere through this year. But for some reason persevere didn’t set well with me. Honestly, it kind of felt like it was carrying a negative connotation and I didn’t want that. However, it was this line of thinking that led me to God’s Promises, that if I am to persevere in life, in ALL things, I need to know God’s promises and cling to those promises to get me through the tough spots.

Believe has a different connotation to me. For me, believe sounds hopeful and optimistic, as if to believe in and hope for something better, grander, far beyond what I could ask or imagine.

One of my life verses comes at the end of Ephesians chapter 3, specifically verse 20, but the context of the text is this:

14 For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, 15 from whom every family[c] in heaven and on earth is named, 16 that according to the riches of his glory he may grant you to be strengthened with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, 18 may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, 19 and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

20 Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.

This is what I want for this new year, to lay a foundation built upon this prayer, that according to the RICHES of my heavenly Father’s GLORY, that he may grant my family and me to be STRENGTHENED with POWER through his Spirit who lives within us, that we would not just allow but WELCOME Christ to dwell in our hearts through FAITH, that we would be ROOTED and GROUNDED in LOVE, and have STRENGTH to comprehend the BREADTH and LENGTH and HEIGHT and DEPTH of Christ’s LOVE — a love that SURPASSES KNOWLEDGE — resulting in being filled with the FULLNESS of God.

FOR REAL??? This is one of the many wonderful and glorious things God wants for his children. Do I BELIEVE THAT? Do I REALLY?? I want to. And that is what this one word is all about for me. Believing God. Believing his promises. Living and acting and reacting like I believe his promises. No matter what comes my way. Because as is stated in verse 19… Christ’s love surpasses knowledge. So although I wont understand how some of the hard things we experience in life are actually “loving;” I can trust God and believe that he is ABLE to do ABUNDANTLY more than all we could ASK or IMAGINE… BY THE POWER OF GOD AT WORK WITHIN US! God wants to use us to bring this “abundantly more” into being. How cool is that?!

What will all this look like for my family and me this year? I have NO idea. And at times I am certain that things could look “bad” according to the worlds standards. John 16:33 records a promise Jesus made to his disciples, “In this world you will have trouble! But TAKE HEART, I have overcome the world!”

Please pray that I will trust in that love of Christ that surpasses knowledge and that I will believe God and all his wonderful promises that he will lead me to discover as I spend my year identifying, understanding, and BELIEVING God!

Love of CAPS in this blog. I am EXCITED! Its going to be a good year.

 

My Focus for 2013

God began to prepare my heart for this year’s “focus word” a few months ago. He planted in me a thirst to truly understand his promises in his word. I confess that I am certain that in my 30+ years as a believer in Christ, I have taken some of the bible verses relative to God’s promises out of context. God has now given me a strong desire to know the promises I can claim and stand firm on them!

So this year I am not focusing on one word as I have in the past. This year I am focusing on God’s promises. I am going to do the work and get to the bottom of God’s promises that I can claim today and stand firm upon amidst life’s storms.

The truth is this: I have grown significantly in the last several years in a variety of ways. Early in 2011, I even felt like God allowed a “break” or time of rest if you will, where he was going to give me a reprieve from facing the giants and allow me to rest and be at peace. Now as we begin 2013 I sense this time of rest is over. Already God is opening my eyes to giants that I have yet to face and giants that I didn’t even know where there. Despite the growth in my spiritual & emotional understanding of God and myself, I am painfully aware that vacation is over and its time to get back to work. And the work that needs to be done in this season is me, digging deep into God’s word, discovering his promises for me, memorizing them and meditating on them until my mind is renewed and my heart is secure.

We face uncertainty in our lives this year like we have never experienced. We have many unanswered questions and the temptation to give in to worry and anxiety and fear is greater for me than it has been in a very long time. I know the only solution is to stand firm on the true promises of God, and to really understand the meaning of the promises. I really want to get this right. I am desperate for God to lay this foundation in me, so that as we pass through storms we are not shaken, rather firmly rooted in the solid rock of his word.

So there you have it. I will focus on God’s Promises this year and as I come to a deeper understanding of these promises I will happily share them here on my blog.

What I Learned About Discipline in 2012

Last year my one word to focus on for 2012 was “discipline.” I wrote about this alot on the blog. Its interesting now to look back and remember the things that I learned about discipline and how my attitude and perspective toward discipline has changed. So now, after twelve months of focus, here are the things I learned about discipline:

I am the most disciplined when I am in relationship with God. When I incorporate time to pray and meditate on scripture into my daily routine, I find that the other areas of my life fall into a natural rhythm of discipline, among other desirable qualities such as joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness,  gentleness, goodness and love. In my personal experience, I am stronger as a person and embody these characteristics, when I include prayer and Bible reading in my daily routine.

Discipline has many applications. When I started my focus on discipline, my motivation was to lose weight. Before 2012, I rarely thought of discipline as anything other than diet and exercise. I have since learned that discipline exists in every area of life. I realized that there are some areas where I am quite disciplined and other areas where discipline doesn’t come easy. I see my need for discipline in everything from meal planning and staying on top of household chores, to speaking my husband’s love language and showing him the respect that, as a man, his heart craves (despite how I may or may not be “feeling” at the time). Discipline to let my yes be yes and my no be no. Discipline to not over commit in attempt to boost my ego “to be needed” or “feel important” while at the same time discipline to choose to engage in something uncomfortable or that I would simply rather not do because its the RIGHT THING to do. I could go on, but the point is that, through focusing on discipline, my eyes were opened to discipline’s many manifestations.

Discipline = Delayed Gratification. When I discipline myself, when I resist something I want, when I hold my tongue, when I serve someone else when I am exhausted, when I force myself to do something difficult or that makes me feel uncomfortable I RARELY regret it and almost always receive some kind of reward or personal gratification as a result. There is fruit to be had and enjoyed in a life of discipline, I just have to be willing to wait for the reward and trust that my hard work is not in vain. I must be willing to do the work and wait on the desired outcome. This is the hardest, yet, most beautiful aspect of discipline to me; as we do what we know is best and wait, we demonstrate our belief, faith and hope in something bigger than ourselves to step in on our behalf. For me, that faith and hope is in God and the promises in the Bible. And I have personally experienced the fruit — the delayed gratification — of obeying God and waiting on Him to act on my behalf. I pray that I will make a practice of this more in the new year.

Discipline will never come easy to me. We all have things that come easy to us and things that we have to work hard to achieve. I have grown to accept that cultivating discipline will be a life-long effort on my part and will not be achieved apart from hard work and ongoing willingness to change. I used to resent discipline. I used to believe that disciplined people were all work and no play (read: no fun). Now I know that discipline is a beautiful gift that some folks are hardwired to be good at in their lives. I am hardwired to be good at other things in my life, but that doesn’t mean I can dismiss discipline and avoid discipline. It just means I am going to have to work harder to achieve it.

Thanks to those of you who have followed along with me as I’ve focused on discipline. I have really appreciated the comments, exhortation and affirmation I have received from many of you along the way. I am quite grateful for this blog as a way to communicate and for those of you who interact with me on the various topics. I have not totally decided on my focus for 2013 but I am narrowing it down and will post about the new word for the year in the very near future.

Happy New Year!